'It’s All About the Benjamins Baby’-Puff Daddy
There is a magical website where you can find ANYTHING that you would ever need: Craigslist.com. You can buy a house, a car, a dog, a new wardrobe, an iPhone, a cheap prostitute, combat boots, dirty mop water, a clown, a sandwich, a personal trainer; whatever your imagination can conjure up...it's most likely on the craigslist. Close your eyes, point and click, and *poof* there it is. Isn’t that great? Shit, if he could, I'm sure Craig would probably let hit-men post their ads on his site.
Personally, all I need is a decently priced apartment (in Brooklyn, please. Thank you.)
So, I’ve been searching through the postings for the past two-weeks. And guess what? I found the PERFECT place!
Monday after work, I hopped on the 5-train to take a look at it. It was a one-bedroom spot in East Flatbush. After speaking with the owner, it seemed like more than I expected. ‘It has more of a condo feel to it’ he claimed. Hmm. I knew not to get my hopes up too high-this place couldn’t have been that nice for a price that low. No way.
Wrong.
Once I reached the last stop on the 5, I made my way up the street. From the looks of the houses and the neighbors, I felt good vibes already. The place had to be at least habitable.
I walked up in front of the house and the owner greeted me. I was surprised that he was Black. Why? I don’t know-he didn’t sound like a Black man on the phone- and even if it was a racist observation, so what. Deal with it.
The house was very nice-not a typical ‘Brooklyn’ home. It looked very suburban. We made our way up the driveway, to the side entrance and walked down into the apartment.
WOW.
I had to blink twice to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating-this place was gorgeous! The décor was lovely: fresh paint, stable floors and an updated kitchen. The appliances were stainless-fucking-steel! The bathroom, although it didn’t have a full bathtub (who cares) had the flyest sink I've ever seen in my life: a clear glass bowl with a fancy silver faucet. Even the bedroom was sizeable. The kitchen had drawers and a modern glass sliding glass cabinet. Envisioning myself in this place- the feng shui, the pumpkin-colored walls and that bathroom-sink had me totally sold. It even SMELLED great in there- I'm a very scent-conscious person. The current tenants had some caramel-spiced oil burning. They also had a tasteful chocolate-brown leather sofa with a matching ottoman. How sexy is that?
‘It’s so nice. I mean, it’s so well kept and modern for a basement’ I complimented the owner. ‘Yea, I’m in construction and remodeling’ the owner interjected. He seemed like he was a good business man and I got a professional yet cool vibe from him. We chopped it up and I immediately filled out the application. There was an 80-dollar application fee-which I didn’t mind paying. In my mind, this was about to be MY PLACE.
Personally, all I need is a decently priced apartment (in Brooklyn, please. Thank you.)
So, I’ve been searching through the postings for the past two-weeks. And guess what? I found the PERFECT place!
Monday after work, I hopped on the 5-train to take a look at it. It was a one-bedroom spot in East Flatbush. After speaking with the owner, it seemed like more than I expected. ‘It has more of a condo feel to it’ he claimed. Hmm. I knew not to get my hopes up too high-this place couldn’t have been that nice for a price that low. No way.
Wrong.
Once I reached the last stop on the 5, I made my way up the street. From the looks of the houses and the neighbors, I felt good vibes already. The place had to be at least habitable.
I walked up in front of the house and the owner greeted me. I was surprised that he was Black. Why? I don’t know-he didn’t sound like a Black man on the phone- and even if it was a racist observation, so what. Deal with it.
The house was very nice-not a typical ‘Brooklyn’ home. It looked very suburban. We made our way up the driveway, to the side entrance and walked down into the apartment.
WOW.
I had to blink twice to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating-this place was gorgeous! The décor was lovely: fresh paint, stable floors and an updated kitchen. The appliances were stainless-fucking-steel! The bathroom, although it didn’t have a full bathtub (who cares) had the flyest sink I've ever seen in my life: a clear glass bowl with a fancy silver faucet. Even the bedroom was sizeable. The kitchen had drawers and a modern glass sliding glass cabinet. Envisioning myself in this place- the feng shui, the pumpkin-colored walls and that bathroom-sink had me totally sold. It even SMELLED great in there- I'm a very scent-conscious person. The current tenants had some caramel-spiced oil burning. They also had a tasteful chocolate-brown leather sofa with a matching ottoman. How sexy is that?
‘It’s so nice. I mean, it’s so well kept and modern for a basement’ I complimented the owner. ‘Yea, I’m in construction and remodeling’ the owner interjected. He seemed like he was a good business man and I got a professional yet cool vibe from him. We chopped it up and I immediately filled out the application. There was an 80-dollar application fee-which I didn’t mind paying. In my mind, this was about to be MY PLACE.
While mentally comparing it to my current basement apartment in East New York, I felt like smacking the shit out of my landlady. Look what I was missing?!?
And I will continue to MISS it. I got an e-mail from the owner this morning:
Hello the apt. is taken. I thank you for trying to follow up with me. They put half of the cash up and the rest when they move in. If anything bizarre happens and you are still looking I will let you know.
Damnit. And I thought we bonded! As much as I hate to admit it, I do understand his position. Money talks. My sweet-face, curly hair, full-time job and friendly conversation wasn’t enough for this one. I hate whoever that guy is who got the place over me.
Now, I’m not one to complain, but I just had to express my pain. When things like this happen, it confirms the over-used, abused and applicable universal quote: Life isn’t fair. Since that guy put up half-a-years worth of rent than maybe he should be buying his own fucking house- and not hogging up affordable, beautiful basement apartments with awesome glass bathroom sinks from poor, working class gypsies like me!
I have faith that everything will be alright (still an optimist). I’m just hurt right now. Plus, I’m out of my 80-dollars. Puff- you were right.
Fuck.
2 comments:
Woow! That really sucs! the place sounded soo fly. $80 bucks tho?? He got you because it does not cost more that $25 to run someones credit!
And if he was money hungry, he should have told you up front, put half down and its yours...life and people are not fair
If it's too good to be true, chances are that it's a scam. You'll eventually learn how to weed thru them ads. But good luck on your search.
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